Last Wednesday (Jan 13th), I fell on my icy sidewalk and broke the radial head of my elbow when I went to mail some letters . It was horribly painful for a first few days, and I was woozy from the medication, but now I'm doing much better. It still hurts, but only when I move it too far or try to bear weight on it.
I have realized that when you break something, it gives you perspective. I've gotten SO much done with one arm (and the help of my kids), mostly out of fear of being buried under a load of housework. I now realize how much more I could be doing with two arms, if I exercise some self-discipline.
Having two arms is such a blessing. In random order, here are some of the things I miss doing:
1. Hugging my kids. I love to grab them and smother them with kisses, since they're at the stage now where they sometimes fight my affection. Very hard to do with only one arm.
2. Putting up my hair. My husband has been putting a scrunchy-ponytail in my hair each morning before work. I cannot blow-dry, or otherwise style my hair (including putting it up), with only one hand. For those who know how much I'm caught in ponytail bondage, this has been rough.
3. Sleeping on my side. I have been a side-sleeper since having my kids. I can only sleep on my right side at this time, and only by gingerly propping up my left arm with many pillows. This results in my needing to think happy thoughts so I don't feel claustrophobic.
4. Making bread. I love to make homemade bread, but I simply can't knead it with one arm. I suppose I would have to learn to do it, if my other arm were gone and I had no choice. But right now I'm suffering through the store-bought variety.
5. Blowing my nose. Without elaborating, doing that one-armed doesn't work well.
But, enough of my whining. Here's a random list of some things I am so thankful for, in the midst of this trial:
1. It was my elbow, and not my head, that broke. The ice where I fell was amazingly slick and I was down before I knew it. My injuries could have been much more serious, possibly even fatal, if I'd cracked my head on the step on my way down.
2. I'm right-handed, and it's my left elbow that broke. It would have been hard to try writing, brushing teeth, etc., as a south-paw, which probably would have resulted in a higher degree of whining on my part. (My husband is also thankful for this one.)
3. My husband was home when I fell. It would have been hard for Glen to leave work to come home and take me to the ER. I don't know how the logistics of getting there and taking care of kids would have worked out, if he wasn't home.
4. I don't work outside my home, so I didn't have the extra stress of missing work and losing income.
5. I homeschool my kids, so I had (and have) three incredible helpers at home with me. I've told all of them that I don't know what I would have done without them.
I'm also thankful for God getting my attention through this. It occurred to me that that the hardness of the concrete that I fell on is what broke my elbow. Sometimes, we come up against people who are hard, and we get "broken." Maybe not physically, but the pain is still real. I've been struggling with unforgiveness about some things, and I feel like God was showing me that holding on to my anger and my hurt was making me hard, causing me to hurt others--not in a mild way, but in an incapacitating way. God has worked on my heart since I fell, and I'm thankful for what He's done in me through my injury. I was reminded of this scripture:
"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh," (Ezekiel 36:26 NASB).
I wish it didn't take such drastic measures to get my attention, but I'm glad that God loves me enough to allow whatever it takes to make me listen.
I have realized that when you break something, it gives you perspective. I've gotten SO much done with one arm (and the help of my kids), mostly out of fear of being buried under a load of housework. I now realize how much more I could be doing with two arms, if I exercise some self-discipline.
Having two arms is such a blessing. In random order, here are some of the things I miss doing:
1. Hugging my kids. I love to grab them and smother them with kisses, since they're at the stage now where they sometimes fight my affection. Very hard to do with only one arm.
2. Putting up my hair. My husband has been putting a scrunchy-ponytail in my hair each morning before work. I cannot blow-dry, or otherwise style my hair (including putting it up), with only one hand. For those who know how much I'm caught in ponytail bondage, this has been rough.
3. Sleeping on my side. I have been a side-sleeper since having my kids. I can only sleep on my right side at this time, and only by gingerly propping up my left arm with many pillows. This results in my needing to think happy thoughts so I don't feel claustrophobic.
4. Making bread. I love to make homemade bread, but I simply can't knead it with one arm. I suppose I would have to learn to do it, if my other arm were gone and I had no choice. But right now I'm suffering through the store-bought variety.
5. Blowing my nose. Without elaborating, doing that one-armed doesn't work well.
But, enough of my whining. Here's a random list of some things I am so thankful for, in the midst of this trial:
1. It was my elbow, and not my head, that broke. The ice where I fell was amazingly slick and I was down before I knew it. My injuries could have been much more serious, possibly even fatal, if I'd cracked my head on the step on my way down.
2. I'm right-handed, and it's my left elbow that broke. It would have been hard to try writing, brushing teeth, etc., as a south-paw, which probably would have resulted in a higher degree of whining on my part. (My husband is also thankful for this one.)
3. My husband was home when I fell. It would have been hard for Glen to leave work to come home and take me to the ER. I don't know how the logistics of getting there and taking care of kids would have worked out, if he wasn't home.
4. I don't work outside my home, so I didn't have the extra stress of missing work and losing income.
5. I homeschool my kids, so I had (and have) three incredible helpers at home with me. I've told all of them that I don't know what I would have done without them.
I'm also thankful for God getting my attention through this. It occurred to me that that the hardness of the concrete that I fell on is what broke my elbow. Sometimes, we come up against people who are hard, and we get "broken." Maybe not physically, but the pain is still real. I've been struggling with unforgiveness about some things, and I feel like God was showing me that holding on to my anger and my hurt was making me hard, causing me to hurt others--not in a mild way, but in an incapacitating way. God has worked on my heart since I fell, and I'm thankful for what He's done in me through my injury. I was reminded of this scripture:
"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh," (Ezekiel 36:26 NASB).
I wish it didn't take such drastic measures to get my attention, but I'm glad that God loves me enough to allow whatever it takes to make me listen.
Do you still need meals brought? I haven't been on facebook a lot lately, so I didn't know if you still needed them or if you had a lot of response from your status posting. I could bring one on Sunday or Monday (either this one coming up or the one following). Let me know.
ReplyDeleteThis was a really good blog post and an amazing observation about our held-in and holed-up hurts causing us to hurt others! Thanks so much for taking the time to type it all up!
ReplyDelete