When Friends Unfriend You

I have been off of Facebook for a couple years now, and I don't miss it a bit.

Not only is it a competitive, voyeuristic environment that just simulates social interaction; when you no longer want someone in your list of friends, you just hit the "unfriend" button. To me, that seems so mean. (I don't even like the sound of that word!)

It's tough when you are unfriended. Especially if you don't know why. I've recently been "unfriended" by someone that I've been friends with since high school. This isn't a facebook thing, this is real life.

Luke 17:1 mentions the inevitability of stumbling blocks entering our lives. The Greek word for stumbling block is skandalon. This word refers to the stick which is the trigger in a box trap, where the stick props up the box and bait is put under the box. When the prey goes for the bait, the stick is pulled and the prey is trapped.

Jesus is saying "when" these stumbling blocks come, not "if." And the potential for those stumbling blocks (offenses) to trap us in bitterness and resentment is high. I know this not only from experience, but because of the verses that follow:

"He said to His disciples, 'It is inevitable that stumbling blocks come . . . Be on your guard! If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times a day, and returns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ forgive him,'" (Luke 17:1a, 3-4).
Jesus tells us to be on our guard, and then to be ready to confront an offender, if need be. The biggest whammy here is when he tells the apostles to forgive -- even if the same person does the same thing seven times a day and keeps asking for forgiveness! Is it any wonder they replied, " Increase our faith!"

Regardless of how hard we try to make a friendship work, it takes two. If one person walks away, you can't have a relationship. The only thing you can do is determine to forgive him or her, and guard your heart against bitterness. 

The Lord never wastes pain, so I know He will teach me something through this trial. If my heart is tender, I will be in a place to learn the lesson. (And I don't know about you, but I hate retaking a test!)


  1. This is the exact lesson I am teaching the Daisies this month. You can see the look of "what? I have to KEEP forgiving" on their little faces. I am sorry you have been "unfriended"....it's so hard to not be bitter about it.

    1. Yes, Lori, is hard! God's grace is really evident in my life right now, covering this whole situation. I am thankful for how He has taught me what a trap bitterness is, and how destructive it is to be caught in it!

      Thanks for commenting! :-)


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